do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
