OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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