just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Randomize
