i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
