It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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