He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
