too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize