he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
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