btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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