...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
