My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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