Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
So squirting runs in the family.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
