she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize