Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize