Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
