Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize