sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
