True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
