Im at strip club and am horny
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
