butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
