I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
third nipple confirmed
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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