Who did Billy Mays play for?
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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