Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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