we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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