I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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