white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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