so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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