do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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