highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
