her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
