well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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