On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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