Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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