You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
