i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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