they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
