? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
