I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize