I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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