JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
