I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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