"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
