anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Randomize