Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
