Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
