he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
