I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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