ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
