he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
