Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
