I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
